Reptile 16

While he has been sighted at White Hart Lane on far fewer occasions than other conspicuous bloggers, the site's 'Official Outworlder' definitely exists.  In popular culture, Reptile is an acid-spitting, face-munching raptor with a penchant for masquerading as a humanoid ninja.  In reality,  the face behind the name is most likely a public servant or accountant but likes to act all cerebral about football.  Who knows?  You decide...



Adventures of a Born-Again Washed-Up Sunday League Footballer
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Written by Reptile 16   
Saturday, 21 January 2012 10:17
Those who frequent Twitter may have noticed a series hashtags or references to "Sunset Season", or something equally vague.  These point to a personal journey wherein I have returned to bottom-flight football in a manner not-exactly mirroring Paul Scholes (though as I did it first, technically he copied me).  Here then, I have charted the rather circuitous journey in to and exiting football and my completely un-tumultuous return.
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The Metaphysical Side of Football
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Written by Reptile_16   
Monday, 14 November 2011 18:15

One of the great, unanswered questions of philosophy is the QI favourite: If a tree falls in the forest and there is nobody there to hear it, does it make a sound?  Now, I think we can add the contemporary footballing parallel which is: If England beat the World Champions in a friendly and nobody gives a rat's ass, did it actually happen?

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Niko Kranjčar: Half-term report
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Written by Reptile 16   
Tuesday, 04 January 2011 16:40
Apps: 7
Goals: 0
Highlight: Playing almost a full game when Twente visited.
Lowlight: Being hauled off at Bolton.
Average We Are Tottenham Match Rating: 5.50/10

Poor Niko. Having played his part in last season's 4th place squad he finds himself now consistently warming the bench following an injury in the FA Cup Semi-final in April, and has the dubious distinction of being the most-used "sub not used" with 18 occasions on the bench without making it to the pitch. The form of compatriot Luka Modric and the introduction of Rafael van der Vaart to the squad - combined with Gareth Bale's emergence as a force in Premier League/Champions' League football - have served to squeeze the opportunities for Niko to re-assert himself as a regular starter this term.

With just 352 minutes playing time this season from a possible 25 squads made, Niko must be wondering when his next game will come. It would seem though that other clubs also covet his services, with loan/permanent moves to Everton, Liverpool and Celtic all still possible. That said, four of Niko's appearances were in the Champions' League and Harry has gone on record as stating that the Croat still has a role this season. While obviously there is a nil sum game to be played here for Niko, in that somebody will need to be injured or lose form for him to step in, I for one would not like to see him lining up for Premiership rivals any time soon. Time will tell though, it will come down to whether Harry can persuade a player of his undoubted ability to patiently wait his chance in the face of a simple move to a [probably] lesser team for guaranteed football.

Grade: D, has had no chance to shine.
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Sandro Ranieri Guimarães Cordeiro: Half-term Report
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Written by Reptile 16   
Saturday, 15 January 2011 22:41
Apps: 9 (including 4 Starts)
Goals: 0
Highlight: Getting the nod for the CC visit of the Goons
Lowlight: A properly shocking performance away at Notlob
Average We Are Tottenham Match Rating: 5.67/10

Sandro took what seemed like an age to arrive at White Hart Lane. Originally the subject of a bid in August 2009, the deal was concluded in March 2010 with the player released by Internacional following the conclusion of their Copa Libertadores campaign - which they won - on 18th August 2010. There is no doubt that the protatcted nature of the deal and the prestige earned by the player having been part of the winning team in the South-american equivalent of the Champions' League led to many expecting a fair amount.

It was over a month before Sandro was handed his first-team debut - against none other than the Auld Enemy themselves, albeit at home in the Worthless Cup. Despite a decent showing, the team was eventually overpowered by the three-dozen fourteen year-olds that M. Wenger put out that night. Next action was as a sub fourteen seconds from the end of normal time of the 2-1 home win against Villa, this was followed swiftly by the first half against Fulham and some weeks later the second-half against Everton. A win, draw and loss out of those three and some glimpses of the ability that convinced Harry to shell out an undisclosed amount (in the region of £8million) for the player though.

So...away at Bolton and while the defeat was attributable to a poor showing all-round, the lad was some way off the pace still. Since then, opportunities in the league have been restricted to substitute appearances totalling just three minutes, before a full run-out in the FA Cup against Charlton, where he was effectively depolyed to do the same job as Palacios but did not let himself down.

Sandro has some way to go before Spurs (management and fans) see the finished article.

Grade: D
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William Gallas: Half-term report
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Written by Reptile 16   
Monday, 27 December 2010 22:10
Apps: 15
Goals: 0
Highlight: Pulling on the famous lilywhite shirt for the first time.
Lowlight: Looking decidedly off the pace in Milan.
Average We Are Tottenham Match Rating: 6.60/10

William Gallas has come out of a challenging beginning to his Spurs career with quite some credit. Formerly a pupil at both the Death Star and Second-hand Fridge, it seemed that William could have been excluded for the 2010/11 campaign until Headmaster Redknapp saw fit to give him one more chance at Tottenham Hotspur.

Following on from an excursion to South Africa with his countrymen in the Summer, William looked somewhat tired and perhaps a little unfit for his early outings, though he showed touches of the ability that saw him do well elsewhere. Alongside Younes Kaboul, William has formed the most-deployed central defence partnership for Tottenham thus far, with 9 out of 26 outings. Clearly William has much he can do to bring the likes of Younes along and they still have some work to do between them to avoid the kind of communications breakdown that inexplicably occurred when Sunderland visited.

An admirable start to his time at White Hart Lane that will need to be maintained but William is certainly capable of doing very well over the course of the season.

Grade: B
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